I Just Had a WTF???! Moment in the Office Today

You know, I've been spouting off line after line, day after day, on and on, about how I don't belong in the job I'm in ... how miserable it is ... blah blah blah. The truth is, I am grateful to be working, first and foremost, especially during this time when so many people and families are spreading word of lost jobs and hard times. I don't want to sound like I'm trivializing anybody's struggle by constantly complaining about my job. But every so often, I look around the cube farm I am currently located and wonder why the hell I'm still here.

Granted, A-B is, always has been, and probably always will be despite the purchase by InBev a "Good Ole Boy" company. I see the same thing day in and day out. Lines of caucasian men, almost in-step, wearing the same khaki pants and button down dress shirts of slightly different pastel colors trot proudly to their respective spaces made so by 4 foot modular walls. They appear to be quite content with this humdrum routine, and I would never want to diminish the fact that they find their happiness in this existence. I kind of envy the fact that these men can smile everyday, carrying in lunch bags prepared by their wives, driving into work with family friendly sedans, discussing things like their new lawn mowers and their kids' soccer games they watched over the weekend. It's not their fault that I find this cookie cutter lifestyle boring and in many ways elitist. It's not their fault that I sit in my psuedo-walled bunker, not talking about my life, scared to be out and blackballed because of it. And yes, we have moved to a more casual environment, being able to wear blue jeans everyday. But for some reason, these same men still seem to look alike to me.

Okay, so I always think to myself, "Jen, damnit, stop putting these people in a box. It's just as bad to assume they are a certain way because of the way they carry themselves at work. Get over yourself and your 'boo-hoo, I'm so out of place' attitude! People are people, and just because you are too chicken shit to be out at work doesn't always mean that you will be discriminated against or treated any differently if they knew. So just hush and do your job!" Yes, this is what I have to tell myself occassionally to make sure I don't walk around with a big chip on my shoulder. Well, telling myself things like that works some of the time. Other times, I just have to hang my head based on the kind of things that I see on days like today.

Event number 1 happened in a small meeting I had with my boss and another coworker of mine. I'm used to the BS and small talk that occurs before getting down to actually discussing business, but I don't think some people think before they speak (I am often guilty of this myself). We openly discuss what pleasant holiday weekends we had, and then my boss begins to grill the other guy about church. I was amazed at how he was getting on his case about not going to mass yesterday. I finally opened my mouth and said, "Joe, you do know that not everybody goes to church right? And you do know that it is okay if he chooses not to? And you do know that this isn't even appropriate to talk about here at work, regardless of the fact that you are both attendees of the same parish?" I was so perturbed. *sigh*

Event number 2 happened just as I was walking back to my cube after this meeting. This is actually pretty funny and "Office Space" movie-esque. I saw two gentlemen greet each other about 15 yards in front of me. Check out the dialogue.

"Hey there, Steve-O!"
"Well, how's it going, Steve?"
"Fine and dandy," Steve #1 replies as he pats Steve #2 firmly on the shoulder.
"So have you talked to Steve *****?" (last name respectfully not included on my part)
"Nope. Last I heard, Steve was taking some time off. Having problems with his boy."
"That's an understatement! His boy's been kind of a fruit lately," Steve #2 says with laugh.
"You got that right, Steve. I think he took him to Johnny's to make sure he turns out right," Steve #1 states seriously.

Now let me first say this, yes, the number of Steve's is hilarious and true. While walking behind them, I had to hold in my laughter. I imagined the third Steve looking just like these two with the same haircut and all. But the humor of the situation quickly turned to disdain for their ignorance. Let me explain. Johnny's is a local lunch spot here in St. Louis that generally has a male client base. The reason being is that the waitresses are all dressed in lingerie. I have no problem with businesses such as this existing. They make money legally and there is no reason I can't go elsewhere for lunch. It doesn't bother me that some people choose to go there. It only bothers me when Steve #3 feels like the only way to have his son "turn out right" is to take him to nudey lunch spots. And it REALLY upsets me that Steve's #1 and #2 feel like it's totally appropriate to discuss this shit at work, and that Steve #3 is doing the right thing by showing his "fruit" of a son that this objectification of women may be just the thing to make him straight. *double sigh*

So, yep, I'm gonna sit right here in my cube still and quiet, doing my job as per usual. I'll even continue to try to convince myself that not everyone here is a Steve (because surely they aren't all the same).